clean slate

Parenting is an amazing challenge.It is fun to learn to bond with each child..they are all so different! As I learn about each of them, I  gain knowledge and wisdom. At the same time, the kids grow and develop too. So I keep all my knowledge and experience to equip me for anything, but I've realized that I also need to wipe my  slate clean with each kid so I can react to them individually.  What's good for one kid is not necessarily good for the other.  I need to think about what makes that kid tick using their love language, their birth order, their good and bad experiences, their competitiveness, their sensitivities.   I need to take time to respond with strength and sensitivity.   Some kids open up easily, while others require me to probe to prove that I care...yet as they get older, I have to learn when to give them freedom and when to reign them in. When they proove themselves academicely, I need to be careful to watch their social interactions.  Most importantly,  I think they need to know that I love them no matter what. I'm human and make mistakes,  but at the end of the day, if we give hugs and prayers, including confessions to God and to each other, and lots of laughs, I've done the best I can as a parent.

We are His Masterpiece

Ephesians 2:10
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

This verse is worth meditating on. When we take off all the worldly junk and put on Jesus, He makes us his beautiful masterpiece. When He created us, he had big plans for us. It didn't just happen yesterday or a few weeks ago. His plan started when we were being formed. He made us because He loved us as his workmanship. We are each made differently and we are all a one of a kind. Sometimes we feel like a misfit, like we don't belong. The interesting thing is that we are not meant to fit in, we are made to stand out, to be unique, to shine for HIM.

So how does this fit in with our kids. Do we shine for Jesus as we go along our daily routine? Do the kids know we think we are special in His sight, or do we put ourselves down? Do they see Jesus in our relationship with our spouse and our friends? Does God's light (or lack of light) shine from us to them? We can go along everyday and not even notice the kids. If they are into their own music, their own friends, their own tv, we can say “oh, that is just the way they are”, or “i can't do anything with them”. It doesn't have to be that way. Our influence on them is invaluable! God's light shining through you to your kids requires them to be with you to see the light. When they see it, they can feel the warmth of the Sonshine, and it radiates from you to them. They may not tell you about it, but it gives them security and love and they begin to believe that they are masterpieces also.

We need to tell our kids how special they are, even when they screw up. Jesus never demands us to be perfect, but loves us through our imperfections and teaches us how to be obedient. He leads us back to His plan for our lives and shows us the best way. He is the best example for us as parents. We need to show our kids we love them unconditionally and teach them how to obey. It is a long process, but if they can learn to obey Christ through our teaching, they will realize they are special in His sight and he isn't going to give up on them, and neither are we. Our children are meant for an amazing purpose, to know they are loved and to share His love with the world.

Lord, Creator, I don't deserve your love, but I'm so glad that you died for my sins. Please forgive me when I doubt your love for me. You have created me as your masterpiece,and I am so glad I am special in your sight. Help me to show the children how special I am in your sight, and to teach them that they are special too. Help me not to ignore them or put them down, but to build them up and to teach them about unconditional love. Show them your love and enable them to realize that they are a masterpiece in your sight.
In Jesus precious name,
Amen

Words that Edify

Words that Edify

“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification that you may impart grace to the hearer.” Eph 4:29

This is a hard verse to follow. It is easy to think the negative and then speak it. Negativity is contagious and causes everyone around to be in a bad mood. Kids are sponges and it is amazing how they pick up on our moods. We as parents have a lot of influence through what we say to our kids. If we use bad language or talk down about people they will act the same way. If we degrade them and tell them, they are they will believe us. They will start having a negative self image and feel worthless themselves. If we are suspicious that they are doing something wrong, it is important not to accuse them. We should ask them what is going on and even ask details. Their answer may be a surprise. Then, we can understand the big picture and discuss with them how they should proceed.

We want to build up our kids and create ways to make them feel special. One thing I do is give them an adjective every night about what I think about them. That is the last thing they think about before they go to bed. They give me one too and it is fun to create new words to describe the kid that day and also to hear what they think of me that day. We also have a time of prayer every morning and before bed at night. That helps us not to focus on ourselves, but to give our words and actions to God. I encourage you to find special ways to give your kids encouraging words. They may not respond the way you want them to, but they will hear them and the will grows in their minds and hearts.

Lord, You are so good to me. I'm sorry for my negative language. I don't want to tear down the kids, but to build them up and edify them. Help me use words of grace, not judgment. Show me how to teach the kids to have a good attitude and to be honest and open with me. Help me to take time to listen to them before I speak and give me wisdom as I respond to their confessions.

I love you, In Jesus name, Amen